A woman who went on a family trip with her husband and his parents decided to leave early after she was excluded from a fancy dinner by her in-laws. She shared her story on Reddit’s “Am I the A-hole” (AITA) forum, where she received overwhelming support from the online community.
In-laws assumed she wouldn’t be familiar with the food
The woman, who goes by the username AirSignificant4781, explained that her mother-in-law (MIL) always thought that she was “a bit ‘ignorant’ and ‘backward’” and that she had no etiquette because she came from a lower-class family. She said that after they arrived at the hotel, her husband and his family arranged to visit a fancy restaurant for dinner, but did not invite her. She only learned about it at the last minute when her husband was already dressed.
She wrote: “I asked where he was going and he said he & family were going to eat out but I wasn’t invited because his mom ‘assumed’ that since I wouldn’t be familiar with the food and ‘how to eat it’ it there at the restaurant, then it’s better for me to stay-in and eat at the hotel.”
She said that she did not argue and just let him go, but she felt hurt and humiliated by the exclusion.
She packed her bags and flew home without telling anyone
The woman decided that she had enough of her in-laws’ snobbery and disrespect, so she packed her bags and took the first flight home. She did not tell anyone about her departure, which caused her husband to freak out and call her many times. When he found out that she went home, he blew up and called her “ridiculous and irrational”. He also said that she acted in an ungrateful manner and embarrassed him in front of his family. He gave her the silent treatment after he came home.
The woman also said that her in-laws were indirectly criticizing her on Facebook for what she did. She wondered if she overreacted and asked the Reddit users if she was the a-hole.
Reddit users sided with the woman and slammed her husband and in-laws
The majority of the Reddit users who commented on the post agreed that the woman was not the a-hole and that her husband and in-laws were. They said that what they did was rude, insensitive, and unacceptable. They also said that her husband should have stood up for her and refused to go to the dinner without her. Some users even suggested that she should reconsider her marriage and leave him for good.
Here are some of the top comments:
- “NTA you hubby is a massive AH for not standing up for you, for going behind your back to a meal in a GROUP vacation, for being surprised and upset that you left that vacation to go home, and is now giving you the silent treatment? Honey, I have never said this to a post as it is just a snapshot of a relationship. But this relationship is toxic….you need to leave and not look back. He is never going to support you or choose you over his family. Wtf, you are so low class you can’t eat at a nice restaurant? What does that even mean? Run. Run. Run.”
- “NTA. It sounds like you have a husband problem. He went along with you not being included to go to dinner? That is incredibly rude and disrespectful. He didn’t defend you. He could have declined the dinner invitation and gone out with you instead. If you want this relationship to last, you both need to go to counseling to learn communication and boundaries. He also has to grow a spine to deal with his mother.”
- “NTA – A well-known story about Queen Victoria comes to mind. It begins with a dinner with a foreign dignitary. When the finger bowl was given, the visitor drank from it instead of cleaning his fingers. To save his embarrassment, Queen Victoria drank from hers. The in-laws are awful, and so is the husband for not standing up to them. I’m wondering if he’s trying to stay in their good graces for monetary reasons.”
